Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Slow Motion

Dammit...had a minor setback recently. I wasn't able to get the bread I needed for school, so I gotta sit on the sidelines this semester. I can't afford it outta pocket anymore, so I gotta wait for my GRE scores to get back, so I can get financial aid. Hopefully, things will fall in line (GRE, getting fully admitted into my program, all that jazz), so I can go strong at it, once the Winter comes around. I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt, though. The process will have to change, because I had this planned out perfectly, but due to timing, and my own missteps, it'll change, but it's all good.

Besides that, things are cool. I'm gettin' a lil better from being in the mindset I was in about two weeks ago, when I was like "fuck this person, that person, etc." It was liberating (don't know if that's the word I'm lookin' for, but it's the one that came out) to vent, and the process to clear my mind hasn't been all that smooth, but it is what it is, ya know?

I wanna make this clear: when it comes to me, I'll NEVER blame a person for single-handedly causing trouble in paradise, causing things to not work out, or any negativity and friction. It takes two to tango, so you will never see me doing any female-bashing, people-bashing, institutional bashing (well, maybe institutional bashing) or any of that corny shit. Sure, I get mad like the next person, but it's completely unrealistic for things to not work out, solely because of one person (regardless of how stupid and evil that one person's deeds may be). The other party probably did something to contribute to them acting that way. There's no tellin', but it's easier to tell if you're true to yourself (which I try my best to be, on a daily basis). Simply put, I'll vent from time-to-time, but I'll also be quick to acknowledge my role, and if I don't, feel free to check me!

Be easy.

3 comments:

Muze said...

aww. sucks to not be able to go back to school when you want to. that happened to me and i was PISSED. so i think you're taking it very well. lol. hope everything works out.

glad to see you're not saying 'eff the world' anymore. that kind of thinking for too long can be a kill spirit.

Ed The Sports Fan said...

man i'm trying to get into school my damn self for the '09. so we gotta stay on it. also, i think i might be trying to make that move down to Dallas for OU/Texas, what you think?

-Ed.

Eb the Celeb said...

Sometimes life puts you on pause to put things into perspective... so take this time off to evaulate your situation and come back stronger than ever in the spring... good luck with everything!