There are times when you may truly ask yourself...what can be worse?? To be alone, in a sense where noone is around and feels you, or to be in the company of others, but knowing that the actions and words coming from you just aint true. Your compliment is either too far away, or you just may not be on the same page; it could be that you keep the same company, but it still feels like they're outta your range. That person can be the battery to the clock that helps you tick, and without it, it simply doesn't work the same. So you go elsewhere to find a replacement, but you soon realize you're playin' yourself, even if it looks similar or shares the same name...
so you wait.
And as time passes, things don't get better; they just kinda...go along. And it starts to remind you of what that cat was talkin' about in one of those old love songs. Maybe it's gonna be forever, or simply for a minute; it might start back up so strong that we know what we have will never diminish...
...but what if it doesn't start back up? What if more days and nights pass, and these thoughts never go away? Parts of you are sayin, "be patient; be cool," while others are practically beggin' you to stray. Clarity has to come, so the questions in your mind and soul will disapeer, or the loneliness could get even worse, and that just may be the biggest thing to fear.
10/07/08 @ 12:04 A.M.
Photo by Clifton Henri
7 comments:
i can feel you on this one...
we are surely defined in many ways than we might think...
getting out lonely sometimes just makes u have rediscovery...essentially...
i like the flow and i passed on the fly off Muze's 'she's so flyy'
keep going!
with you!
I have felt and lived through and somewhat with that feeling of hopeless emptiness via an estrangement with my children. I identify. I remain optimistic that time heals all wounds, and what was in the beginning will again preside in the end.
Right?
aww. this is very heartfelt and true. and pretty well-written. *smiles*
your writing style is starting to remind me of don's a little. lol.
(that's a compliment, lol)
anyhoo... funny thing is, i am kinda going through a 'lonely' phase right now. not because there is some long lost person out there that i can't replace, but just that i feel alone, even amidst all the adoring eyes and family, and date offers and friends.
i don't know whether or not i've met the person to turn my lonely nights into passion-filled ones, the person who will be able to truly 'see' me, but i surely hope some kind of sign or clarity comes soon.
yea man, i have been there and the strange thing is each song take u a now and old window in your life
I read that book about 3 years ago when I was working on my thesis.
"Nigger"
Impressive read, IMO.
Anyhow about this post... sounds like being trapped in a relationship with someone when you both know its over.
I hate that feeling. Sometimes the mind lets go of what the heart doesn't want to.
B.
even in a crowded room when i feel lonely....that's what i used to fear....now i'm used to it.....
loneliness helps u grow in an odd way...
the one thing i fear is being lonely for the rest of my life....
and as usual, a great read....and inspirational...
Post a Comment